Then, because I'm donating it to a place that "needs" Windows, I went to install Windows XP on the thing. This is where the story gets a little interesting.
I figured I'd install XP, the wireless drivers, then Firefox and AVG Free while running Windows Update. The first two went as planned. Mostly. However, the XP CD had apparently only one video driver. 640x480x16. That's 16 colors, not 16 bits. It also had no drivers for the built-in ethernet port, and had difficulty realizing that the drivers for the wireless card actually went with the wireless card that had just been installed. So, I had:
A 640x480x16 display
No ethernet port
No wireless card
I did not check for the presence or absence of a modem. (But driver updates downloaded from Windows Update lead me to believe that it was not present either.)
Once I convinced Windows to actually use the wireless drivers I had installed, I decided that Windows Update was a slightly higher priority operation than I had thought. 83 (yes eight-three) high-priority updates, one hardware update for the video card, about two hours, and no reboot, later, I now have a sensible 1280x1024x32-bit display, and am happily installing Firefox and AVG. I still have no ethernet or audio though. I will, surprise, surprise, need a reboot to activate at least one of those high-priority updates.
Post-reboot, I still seem to have no audio or ethernet drivers. This is a bit of an issue, especially the no-audio part.